Sunday, March 25, 2007

Sea Captain comes to rescue

MGU made a new friend today. Upon docking at its home destination the gallery assistants were greeted by the Sea Captain. Friendship blossomed.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Hooligans vandalise gallery

Gallery assistants' premonitions came true this morning. Gallery walls were crudely tainted. Offenders, come forward!

Monday, March 12, 2007

Angry onlooker breaks glass

Conflicting reports were received this morning about MGU's broken window. One witness claims to have seen a well dressed man in his early fifties tiptoe up shortland street and hurl a ginger beer bottle through the window of the gallery.

Friday, March 9, 2007

Thank-you Gus Fisher!

It is not easy to find a car park in the city. MGU is grateful to Gus Fisher for letting us park MGU outside his building. We understand the carpark is available to us from March 9 until March 23. During this time the vehicle will be stationary. The door will remain closed. The light will be on. The supporting struts [2] will be lowered to the ground. The wheel locks [2] will be locked. All MGU staff will be relieved from their duties.
Public! Keep an eye on our caravan!

Wednesday, March 7, 2007

Gallery Assistants drift off

Understimulated Gallery Assistants reported today that while at work they seemed to drift off into what can only be described as "la la land".

Critics say "The Art Is Too Good!"

Critics of MGU were in uproar at the latest exhibition that they have labelled as "Too Good". They said the art was so good that it had become sickening. The critics said that while they recognised it as being 'very good contemporary art', the fact was that it repelled them, and many critics were seen limping away from the confused gallery assistants.

Tuesday, March 6, 2007

Gallery involved in drive-by

MGU was invited to Coromandel Town where the assistants drove the gallery up and down the main street for 1 hour on a Sunday afternoon. This type of art action has come to be known as our Sunday-Drive. On this occasion, cafe dwelling holiday-makers and local residents peered up from their plates to watch the performance that we repeated 15 times for their viewing pleasure. The gallery was invited to display itself especially for the leisure class who were seated at cafes all along the road being served one of the meals that they would eat that day. As is the habit of the leisure class, the meals are the main occupation of the day, occuring 3 times, or 5 times for those who indulge in morning and afternoon tea as well. It was designed to be a funny parade, with the gallery pacing up and down the street, slowly, and very very seriously. There is no telling what affect this action may have had, or will have on the population of Coromondel Town, now, or in the future.

Friday, March 2, 2007

MGU holds major retrospective

In another of our summer exhibitions a prominant Auckland artist had an exhibition in MGU that can only be described as a major retrospective.

Thursday, March 1, 2007

Sculptures Disturbed After Hours

During a recent exhibition at 'Hot Water Beach' some drunken teenagers arrived outside gallery hours to view the art. They sat for some time in their van getting more drunk and listening to music in preparation for visiting the gallery. One by one they came to visit. The first drunken youth tried to climb on the gallery roof, before abandoning that plan to peer through the windows. At this time the gallery was exhibiting one very angry sculpture and one very sleepy sculpture. The angry sculpture got very angry. The next visitor was a young girl with a flashlight, and she decided to make a lightshow inside the caravan. The next morning the gallery moved on to another location.